Do you find yourself caught in a mental loop of not feeling good enough, believing you don’t have what it takes, or thinking that the issue is too big and there is nothing you can do?
Welcome to being human! What this tells me is you are a person with a bigger capacity to lead and help change the world, but you get in your own way.
For decades I have found working with mindsets, and developing what I call a Leader’s Mindset is our untapped secret weapon. It works in all areas we feel resigned or stuck – at work, in your career, in your health – even in your love life!
I thought today I would share one of my key processes for shifting mindsets and give you some tools to practice.
This process of Notice / Question / Choose is key to gaining mastery over your mindsets – and those within the teams you manage or families you love.
Notice
Noticing your current mindset is the first step. You can find out what that is by bringing attention to:
Feelings
Notice when you’re
Stressed
Irritated
Annoyed
Defensive
Thoughts
Notice when you’re
Judging your colleagues
Judging yourself “I’m so stupid”, “I’m not able”
Caught in old stories
Thinking “of course they are like that!” or “It’s not my fault!”
Looking for something or someone to blame
Actions
Notice when you’re
Putting things off
Reacting
Not listening, or not speaking
Not asking for help
Not wanting to help others
All of these are signs a Fixed or Limiting mindset might be holding you back.
Notice what you are saying to yourself about this. What is the story you are telling?
You find this story through writing it down. This is the old belief you are holding on to.
Some popular ones at work include: “I’m not confident”, or “We tried this already and it didn’t work”, or “They can’t do it so I’ll have to do it for them”, or “We don’t have enough of ___ resource to proceed.” Which ones do you hear in your team (that’s your organisational or team mindset), or do you tell yourself? It’s great to notice them. You can’t change what you don’t observe.
When you have found a mindset that is holding you back, work with it. Find a buddy that you can share it with. Remember – mindsets are not you – they are beliefs you keep telling yourself.
Mindsets can limit us because every mindset is followed by an action. Your mindset determines whether you step up – or not.
If you are holding back in your leadership, it is likely because you are believing an old story that has become your mindset. Your TRUTH.
This is why this next part is so important.
Question
Questioning our mindsets takes courage – especially when they are linked to stories we’ve had for a while. In questioning, we get to see that what we have told ourselves about a situation may not actually be the truth!
Questioning our mindset takes leadership. Without doing this, we will keep repeating the same patterns over and over. Get curious about what you are saying and believing. Is this supporting your leadership? Does this open up a new space of possibility? Ask: “does this belief help me grow or keep me stuck?”
Choose
We all have the power to choose a new mindset. It can feel strange at first, like putting on a new pair of shoes. You might need to walk around for a while, practicing the new mindset, before it feels comfortable.
Choose the mindset you think will most empower your leadership, and try it on. See what happens!
